original posting 30 July 2009

Writers' Digest, October 2004, pages 26 to 33, has a collection of short "nuggets of wisdom" related to getting published. Maria Schneider is the author of the compilation. Take a deep breath, and here we go:

"Neophyte writers often weaken their writing -- and pick up rejection slips -- by breaking rules in ways they feel are clever but in reality are just inappropriate. Step one: learn the rules. Step two: break them." Stephen Blake Mettee

Shouldn't there be a step between those two? Something like practice, practice, practice? I think about Ray Bradbury talking about copying for some incredibly long period of time, and all the other greats who usually indicate that they steeped themselves in learning the rules and practicing them for a long time before their "instant" success. The novelists who talk about their five or ten novels that they wrote before their first sale -- which is touted as being a breakthrough first novel.

It's not really that the rules are all that great, or that you should treat them as some kind of handcuffs or punishment. It's just that these are things that people have found work, and doing your writing inside the guidelines makes it easier for you as a writer and for your readers. So why do it the hard way?

Somewhere I've seen a comment about swimming in a river with the current -- you can swim against the current, and get nowhere. You can swim across the current, and you get somewhere, but you're also fighting the current to reach the point that you intend to reach. Or you can swim with the current, and you go faster than you thought you could. Sometimes I think the rules are like a current of the river.

Just remember Maugham's advice. "There are three rules for writing the novel. Unfortunately, no one knows what they are." Or is that fortunately?

Original posting 9 February 2009

Mix-And-Match

Do you remember the old placemat games in family restaurants like Big Boy? This is almost like that...

Writers Digest, March 2006, page 11 has this handy little quiz. Just match up the authors with their writing advice. No fair googling!

Let's start with the list of writers:

1. Mark Twain
2. W. Somerset Maugham
3. Kurt Vonnegut
4. Elmore Leonard
5. Jan Burke

And now, the writing advice:

A. "There are three rules for writing the novel. Unfortunately, no one knows what they are."
B. "Don't write what the reader will skip over anyhow."
C. "As to the adjective, when in doubt strike it out."
D. "Take a famous writer to bed."
E. "Give the reader at least one character he or she can root for."

Go ahead. Which writer goes with which advice? Oh, and you might want to think about the advice, too.

After all, we all know the right rules for writing a novel -- don't we? And leaving out the boring bits let you concentrate on the good stuff, right? Those little adjectives sneak in whenever we give them a chance, don't they? And when you read good fiction and study at night, it helps (what did you think it meant?) And of course, last but not least, the reader really wants a hero, someone that they feel good about.

Now who said what?

Answers? You want answers? Well, they really should be upside down. That's the way they did it on the placemats and in Writer's Digest. But since I can't figure out how to turn your screen upside down, here they are: 1, C. 2, A. 3, E. 4, B. and 5, D.

Now can we have a maze, too? Or maybe a coloring picture? And fried mushrooms and root beer, 'cause I really like them. :-)

Aha! Over at http://us.cnn.com/2007/HEALTH/parenting/03/06/par.rules.that.stick/index.html they are talking about how to make good rules for kids (from the parent's side of the picture). So they suggest things such as make the rules your way (you don't have to use the same ones your parents had?), fit the rules to the kids (different ones for different kids? Heresy!), let the consequences fit the crime (fill in your own example here, I'm not quite awake yet), the flexibility (age, situation, it depends!), and good models make great kids (e.g. you gotta show you mean it for yourself, too).

So . . .

What rules do the families in your stories have? And how do they mix and match?

Pick a set of characters. A family, so to speak. Now consider a set of rules that they might live by, and the reasons and such. Then you can always have fun with the occasional breakdown and recovery. Go ahead, show us the events when little Jimmy tries rollerskating in the living room. Or the night that Dad had crackers in bed! Or . . .

Little Crimes and Punishment? An instant classic, suitable for the ages.

tink

(psst? Is it time for another context, challenge, or something? What's happening with everyone?)

Eight Rules of Writing?

I've forgotten exactly how I got on it, but I get e-mail odds and ends from Writer's Digest on a regular basis. The headline on one that came by recently intrigued me, so I went over to read it. Apparently someone summarized the eight key rules for writers at a recent conference. Here's the URL http://writersdigest.com/article/steve-berrys-8-rules-of-writing and there is a place there to sign up for your very own news, tips, and special offers. But let's take a look at these rules. Note that the numbered lines are from the webpage -- the commentary is me babbling. Feel free to disagree.

1. There are no rules. You can do anything you want as long as it works.

I think this may be the most important rule -- and the most important modifying phrase, "as long as it works." This is the engineering or pragmatic rule of thumb -- does it work? If it doesn't work, it really doesn't matter how pretty it is, how much time you spent on it, or anything else, it doesn't work. So make sure it works first.

2. Don't bore the reader. You can bore the reader in a sentence, in a paragraph, by misusing words, poorly choosing words, using the wrong length, etc.

MIT used to pay a writing consultant to come in and give a workshop for students and faculty. One of the first and last points that he reminded that group of was that business readers don't have to read your writing. Teachers and other students often read the whole thing, no matter how bad it is, because they have to. Regular readers just stop reading. So the first sentence, and every sentence, paragraph, scene, chapter break -- make it interesting. Make the reader want to keep reading.

3. Don't confuse the reader. Don't misuse point of view. Don't do too much at once.

Keep it simple. Sure, changing points of view, 39 plot lines woven into a complex braid, flashbacks and flashforwards and flashsideways all can be exciting and fun for the writer. But confused readers stop. You want the reader to enjoy it, which means they have to understand and follow it -- easily.

4. Don't get caught writing. Don't let you, the author, enter the story.

He would never come home again. Now how does the protagonist know the future like that? I always like the ones where someone walks into a city, and suddenly describes neighborhoods, history, the sewer system -- just from walking a few feet in. Amazing perception.

5. Shorter is always better. Write tight. It makes you use the best words in the right way.

Purple prose and gonzo writing fill up pages, but you probably don't want to overdo it. Papa Hemingway and The Little Book may be a bit sparse, but do try to keep it tight. You don't have to write haiku, but at least consider the lessons of poetry and keep the words close. And remember Twain's advice about the difference between lightning and a lightning bug.

6. Don't lie to the reader. It's okay to mislead, but don't lie. If you say the characters motivation is A and it turns out to be B (and you haven't foreshadowed it at all), the reader will feel cheated.

I think writers get into this because they're looking for that unexpected twist, and it feels easier to just lie to the reader, use that unreliable narrator and drag the reader into the morass of misunderstanding. But that's not the point! You want to play the mystery game, where all the clues are right out there in front of the reader, but until the great sleuth explains how it all fits together, no one realizes why the sleeping dog is important. Play fair with the reader -- don't lie to them.

7. Don't annoy the reader. Don't use names that are hard to pronounce or write choppy sentences throughout the entire book. It keeps people from getting close to your characters.

An upset reader? That's a confused reader taken one step further, isn't it? Names that are hard to pronounce are hard to remember. Several names that are very close to each other is also a puzzle for the reader -- was this Amos the senior, Amos the younger, Amos the cousin -- oh, who cares! If all of the sentences are the same length, there's a certain singsong effect that builds up.

8. You must tell a good story. Bad writing can be forgiven with a good story. A bad story with the most beautiful writing cannot.

This is an interesting one because it is often to justify not doing one's best with grammar, spelling, and the other tedious details of the craft of writing. And to some extent, it may be true that editors and publishers will work with the writer who has a really good story to fix up the little stuff. But if the story just isn't there, then the best grammatical construction, proofreading, and other craftsmanship won't sell the missing story. So make it a story that you would like to read, that really makes readers interested and excited, and do the best you can with the nails and painting around the edges, but don't sweat it trying to get the last comma in or out. The easier it is to read, the more likely that the editor will see your great story without getting stuck on the grammar, spelling, and interesting font choices you've made in presenting it -- but you do need a great story under the wrappers.

Sorry, hopefully my little comments haven't hidden the eight rules. It's an interesting selection. And I think it's a good place to start, especially with that first reminder -- make sure it works.

So what do you think? Are there any of these that don't quite seem right for you? How would you illustrate or phrase each of these? Are there any other rules that really belong in the mix? What are they and why do they belong in your list?

Something to think about as we charge into a fall full of writing.
tink

[Little Book? Look for the Elements of Style by Strunk and White. Excellent book. Looks like the original 1918 version is available online, while the 1950s versions with White cost something? Most used book stores have it cheap.]

Original posting: Fri, 25 Feb 1994 18:35:01 JST

(I put the sentences on different lines so I could read it)

*chuckles*

posted by jeremy@CSOS.ORST.EDU (Jeremy Smith) to alt.usage.english


Remember to never split an infinitive.
The passive voice should never be used.
Do not put statements in the negative form.
Verbs have to agree with their subjects.
Proofread carefully to see if you words out.
If you reread your work, you can find on rereading a great deal of repetition can be avoided by rereading and editing.
A writer must not shift your point of view.
And don't start a sentence with a conjunction.
(Remember, too, a preposition is a terrible word to end a sentence with.)
Don't overuse exclamation marks!!
Place pronouns as close as possible, especially in long sentences, as of 10 or more words, to their antecedents.
Writing carefully, dangling participles must be avoided.
If any word is improper at the end of a sentence, a linking verb is.
Take the bull by the hand and avoid mixing metaphors.
Avoid trendy locutions that sound flaky.
Everyone should be careful to use a singular pronoun with singular nouns in their writing.
Always pick on the correct idiom.
The adverb always follows the verb.
Last but not least, avoid cliches like the plague; seek viable alternatives.